Friday, March 31, 2006

Sitting in the Dark

From last night.....

It’s just after 9pm. The TV was on. I just settled down to watch Hex. Recorded using Sky+. I’ve never watched it before. The red light was on as well as I was recording Footballers Wives. Suddenly everything goes off. Yes, it’s a power cut. Bugger. Quick look outside confirms that it’s not just me. It’s the block…but not the whole street. Strangely this is the second time it’s happened in about 6 weeks. That last time was the first time for many, many years. So it’s strange that it’s happened again, so soon after.

The last time I couldn’t actually get out of the buildings. The gates have electronic locks. They locked closed. The key wouldn’t even open it from inside. That shouldn’t have happened of course. But that’s fixed. I’m told. Now would be the time to test it, except I’ve just had a bath and I’m ready for bed, so I’m not going out.

It’s a disappointment though. It was coming up to the time to phone C. in Moscow on Skype. The pc still works. Battery, of course. But no broadband. So no call. Still, he’s back tomorrow.

Sitting in the dark, with only a few candles, makes me realise how dependant we are on power. If I had no battery powered the only thing I could do would be to read by candlelight. No radio.

Thank heavens my corkscrew is not electric!


Reading other people's blogs has become slightly addictive. There are three I read regularly because I know the authors (to varying degrees). Then I tend to link to some of their favoured blogs. There's one I check out from time to time. Ryan the loganberrry (with 3 R's). Sometimes wiser than his years!

What interests me is how you seem to think you begin to know someone by reading their blog. Then how you find yourself looking forward to the next posting.

I'm also interested in how some of the bloggers interact with others. I think a couple of these guys met because they were regular readers of each other's blogs. Before and after they appear to regularly catch by way of comments on respective blogs.

There's another I check out. GayBanker. At first it was amusing. It still is, but it's become a little repetetive. His reported liasons becoming clinical like the lanugague he uses to describe them. Satisfactory means an OK shag, but nothing to write home about? However, with him, I'm constantly wondering who he is. I'd love to log on and try and work it out!

Friday Again

And once again I'm counting the hours until C returns. He gets back to Heathrow around 10pm tonight, and hopefully will be home by 11.30pm. He'll probably be rather tired, so I imagine some chat, maybe a relaxing bath for him, and then off to bed.

Tomorrow I have a busy day. K. is over from Prague visiting his man. The plan is that they come to town tomorrow evening. Maybe go see some theatre. I suspect that if I got my ass to the half price ticket booth I could get us some tickets for Whistle Down the Wind. I don't think that it is selling so well at the moment. Threereasons possibly. Firstly it has only just opened (I think the reviews came out this week). Secondly, it's not new. It's been on before. This is a "return" albeit it's at the Palace. Lastly, it's just filling the gap until Spamalot opens.

But I'm now thinking that maybe I don't want to get up and out early and all the way to Leicester Square (or Canary Wharf-if I chance the TKTS booth there being open on a Saturday, which would be more convenient). I'll see how I feel and what C wants.

In the afternoon I have some people coming round. I'm hosting a meeting for our section. I've said they can stay for a wine or a beer before they head out to Soho for a night out with some others. I think K will probably turn up midway through our meeting, so he'll get a chance to hear us.

More thoughts later...

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I Never Knew You Were Going To Be Here

Just roll it in, nice and easy. Don't you just love these irrelevant (is that irreverend?) posts?

Anyway, new Doctor Who is back. Season 2. Saturday 15 April. BBC1 7.15pm.

We have two alien planets (a first for new Doctor Who), Sarah-Jane with K-9 (a girl's best friend), Cassandra again, the return of the an alternate world and then ours. Autons, apparently, and maybe even the Master...but maybe still just wishful rumour.

Friday, March 17, 2006

More Jerry, Jerry

His Majesty's Theatre in Aberdeen, where Jerry Springer plays until tomorrow night, is the third of a trio of fine granite buildings lined up next to each other, consisting of the Public Library, St Mark's Church (Church of Scotland) and HMT.

The buildings are known locally as Education, Salvation and Damnation.

St Mark's, right next door to HMT, is currently hosting Aberdeen Youth Music Theatre's production of Godspell! Ms. Jo(anne) Public thinks"It's shocking that it's going on at the same time." I'm not sure which of the two productions she is referring to however!

As ever the Christian Institute is encouraging protestors to email local Councillors and the theatre sponsors with their messages of outrage. Why not go here and send them your message of support?

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Ciao Bello et Salut

One Sunday night, after a skiing trip in North Bohemia, on my return to London I placed an ad and responded to some on Gumtree. Lonely Hearts stuff. M looking for M - LTR. I replied to one. An Italian doctor. We had dinner. It was nice. I met him again. Another dinner. After dinner we walked. He put his arm in mine, said I made him happy, very happy and he wanted to see me.

I had arranged a proper date with third trip to see Edward Scissorhands (I think it's mentioned below). Afterwards we came back to mine for dinner. He had his toothbrush.

The following Wednesday we were meant to meet for drinks. He had to cancel because a colleague was visiting. But he said he would come to mine after dinner with her. Which he did. He stayed over and I went to work later than usual the following morning.

I never saw him again. He would SMS from time to time, email. But my mails/messages were often met with silences for a while. Then I heard from him again 8th February, asking if I could meet him for a drink. It was a little hard for me. I was in Sunderland on business, just getting ready to get back to London-a 3 hour plus trip. But by then I figured it was a lost cause anyway. And I never heard from him again (nor did I contact him again). Until last night when I had an SMS from him, followed by the following email this evening:

Dear cO
I just want to say how sorry I am for the way I behaved... I did not want to
disappear but in the end I did. I was carried away by my problems... you did
not deserve that and I feel so bad about it... There is no point probably in
telling now what sort of problems I had to face , but I want you to know
that the time I have spent with you was really great and that not for one
moment I was dishonest with you... I hope you can forgive me... I am so
sorry I hurt you... I have gone back to Italy... I had to... and I don't
know if and when I can be back. I hope I will one day, hope it's gonna be
soon but not for the next 1 year and a half.... I got carried away by my
problems and now that I am starting to think I see tha I have lost something
in London! and that I was horrible...
Sorry again...
there is nothing more to say from my part!

He didn't need to apologise of course. I figured him out before he disappeared. I don't know what the problem was. I hope it wasn't serious. I suspect it was something to do with committment, although I thought this a little strange given he was the one looking for a long term relationship. He was the one who initiated the intimacy.

Anyway I've been told I'm a lucky person. The fact F let me down meant that I arranged something else, which involved meeting C. And here I am soon to head out to meet him off the Eurostar to take him home. To our home.

Move On...

Perhaps I'm in a slightly contemplative mood. In a couple of hours C will be boarding the Eurostar in Paris. I'll meet him when he arrives at Waterloo and then we will go home together. Though he won't oficially be moving in with me until next month, his arrival will be symbollic. It is the first time that he has been at mine since we decided to live together. He will also get a set of keys to keep. I have told him that he needs to feel that my home is now his home. We will celebrate with a glass of champagne.

With all this in mind I had emailed S, whom I had been with for over 7 years, before we split up in March/July last year. Some final closure was needed so that I could let go of certain things and feel ok about moving on. I needed to know he was being cared for. I needed to know that our time together had had some purpose for us both.

We had dinner last night. It was nice. There were some sad moments as we recalled the very good times that we had shared. I told him that I was sorry that I wasn't enough to give enough to keep us both together and that I had truly loved him. Right until the end of our relationship.

His new bf moved in with him at the weekend.


Being a little bit of a Eurovision fan, I was bemused to see this item on Serbia and Montenegro's attempt to find an entry for this years competition to be held in Athens on 20 May.

Of course it is a reminder of the bitter racial tensions that still exist all over the world.

Here's how the winning entry was meant to have been selected...

Serbia & Montenegro’s entry for the 2006 Eurovision Song Contest will be chosen during the national final, ‘Evropesma 2006’, which will be held at the Sava Centre in Belgrade on 11 March.

In total, 20 songs will compete to represent Serbia & Montenegro. Among them will be the best songs from the Beovizija and Montevizija festivals.

The Beovizija 2006 festival, comprising 24 songs, will take place at the Sava Centre on 10 March. The top ten songs will go directly to the Evropesma 2006 final.

The other ten finalists will be selected from the 20 entries at the Montevizija festival in Podgorica on 24 February.

The entry for Athens will be selected by a jury of eight people, as well as SMS televoting.

Beovizija 2006 – songs

1. Maler
Blah, blah bend

2. Iskrena pesma
Julija i Julija

3. Izabran
Ivana Selakov

4. Kapija

5. Da ti se dlanovi zalede
Aleksandra Radović

6. Blizina
Zvezde Granda i Šaban Bajramović

7. Greh
Tijana Dapčević

8. Lazarica
Ivana Jordan

9. Romale romali
Ana Nikolić

10. Ludi letnji ples
Flamingosi feat. Luis

11. Kada ti treba
Maja Nikolić

12. Ništa o njoj

13. Poruka za ljubav
Ivana Knežević

14. Bajka
Propaganda 117

15. Konak
Ana Bekuta

16. Vatrena
Koktel bend

17. Sve ili ništa
Marko Jeftić

18. Jednom pokidano

19. Kad me jednom za te ne bude
Vanja Radovanović

20. Otrezni me
Želimir Petrović

21. Osvoji me
Enes Ukić

22. Nisam kriv
Dejan Vozlić

23. Kap po kap

24. Neopisivo
Slađa Ivanišević

Blogs I Read

I don't really consider myself a serious blogger. I rarely find the time. And I then have a tendancy to self censor. I never know who might eventually read this blog... But there are a few blogs I regularly read. Once I have found out how to add a blog bar and the like I will introduce links to them. But here they are in the meantime.

Zefrog, Slightly Lost and Letter Home.

I know the people who write these blogs, and it really does make for interesting reading when you read about people you know and sometimes even make a guest appearance!

Thursday Again

It's another Thursday morning. C arrives on Eurostar tonight, but not until late. It's hard to concentrate...all I can think of is us being together again.

The weekend in Paris was fantastic. We stayed in a rather splendid hotel which really did have the Heavenly Bed.

We didn't do much in the way of sight-seeing. After all, C lived in Paris for a number of years and is a regular visitor there (athough based in London his head office is in Paris). I had visited Paris a couple of times myself in the last couple of years too. We did visit Ile de la Cite and Ile St Louis. We caught the beginning of Sunday morning mass at Notre Dame. The organ music was sinister, and the service was conducted in French, Italian Spanish and German. Not English. I thought this perhaps was because England and catholicism are not often associated. But then neither is German. Later, it was pointed out to me that the Pope is German. That probably accounted for why the organ music was so spooky.... There is something rather demonic about Benedict XVI!

I did want to do a trip along the river on a boat. We duly waitied for the Bateaux Bus outside the Louvre. The Seine was rather high due to heavy rain falls. We took the boat to the Eiffel Tower where we hopped off for a spot of lunch. By the time we had eaten, the police had stopped the boats because the river had risen so much. My trip-the only tourist thing that I wanted to do-lasted just the one short stop. Domage.

Later in the day I met some of C's friends. It was a little tough and tiring to speak all that French, and for much of the time I had to take time out. I couldn't follow what was being discussed all the time. But to be fair, C usually always speaks to me in English, which is not his mother tongue, so it's not too much to expect me to try. My French is passable, I think.

Friday, March 03, 2006

Local Yokel

It may be colder than usual here in London, but it's colder up north, where I come from. I was checking the local paper (thePress & Journal and the Evening Express) to see how it was. Before I knew it I was clicking the links, read a few stories, and remembered how special Aberdeen is. These stories in particular made me laugh (well, more aptly the comments which were made....)

Loving Couple Married at City's Craiginches Jail

...which attracted the comment "Minkers!"

And this comment:
"awww naw how am a gonna pick up ma benifits pay check n get bladdered the night?"
Mr Ned, Torry

to the piece Snowfalls Are The Worst For 50 Years

All this on top of just having finished reading Cold Granite, a crime story set in Aberdeen. In a city of 200,000 how many serial killers can there be? Teaches me not to go home in a hurry!!!

Another Friday Afternoon

Sitting at my desk, counting the hours, minutes, seconds. Not until the weekend (well that too, obviously). Rather until next Saturday when I'm meeting my lover in Paris.

He travels around the world quite extensively, and it's a busy spell for him. So I have only seen him for 6 days and 2 hours, or thereabouts, in the last 3 weeks. He will stay over in Paris for a few days, before coming home to my place two weeks last night. Shortly after, he will be moving in permanently.

Very few friends and my brother know that there is someone special in my life.

Sometimes it seems too good to be true to be believed. I connect with him emotionally and physically. We both want to build on our relationship. Oh, happy times...


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