Tuesday, March 29, 2011


Is it possible to be so bored? I've had too long a day already to stay on in the office and work; I'll get in early tomorrow instead. So I have come home.

I don't really want to cook, in fact I don't really know what I want to eat. On Friday night I had a craving for curry - I hadn't had Indian food forever.

That lasted through 'til Sunday - with some still in the freezer - all for £16. Long gone those Islington days/prices...

Two mains (one with an accompanying veg. curry), two nans, two poppadom. I boiled my own rice - I may be prepared to spend £7k on Olympic tickets, but £1.80 on basmati rice when I have the raw stuff at home - get away!

As a result I was curried out. As a result, last night, I had battered sausage and chips from the local chipper - with curry sauce. Fish and Chip shop curry sauce is very different. Not curry at all, just a hint of curry flavour.

But I couldn't finish it. Too many chips - always the way with the local.

All for £3.10.

Still bored...

When I was in the kitchen earlier this evening I thought I should have a glass of wine. I realise that it itself a symptom of boredom. In fact, I know that boredom is a driver for my drinking.I do it simply because there is nothing else to do!

I don't really want to sit down and watch the TV. That's too involved.

It is probably loneliness - missing mon C. Though this time next week, he'll be back!!! Super good.

Let Me In

Wow! What a great re-make. Loved it.

From Let Me In

Monday, March 28, 2011

Garden Fun

Scotland played Brazil yesterday at the Emirates Stadium. Living fairly close by the area had many kilted guys and yellow and green bedecked Brazillians.

Scotland were delighted with the result. A 2-0 defeat.

Only 1 more week until Xfe is home. His trip to La Reunion has been rescheduled, so he will be here for Eater. Hurrah!!!

These are some flowers I've taken in from the garden. Their perfume is super-strong! I can smell them from the hall, with the front room doors closed.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011


Tonight I was at the legal advice clinic I volunteer at.

I can be very judgemental, and at times I need to check myself. Tonight, as is often the case, I left feeling humble, and lucky.

Tonight I advised a client carrying debt just a little less than the maximum cost of the Olympic tickets I've requested. Yet their income from benefits is just over £100 per week.

We advise on housing, employment, debt and contractual disputes (e.g. sale of goods). One of the first clients I ever advised many years ago was claiming compensation for around £250 for negligent damage to her belongings. She didn't have contents insurance, of course, because she couldn't afford it. I knew that I could have written her a cheque for the amount she was claiming. It would have made no difference to me, but a huge difference to her.


Last night I bought some new film and lenses for my Hipstamatic. Here are the results:

Final thought

Hmmm. Since moving (almost a year ago now), I'm far less creative in terms of blog posts. It's the space I live in now -vs- the space I used to live in. Before I sat in front of the MacBook often, while watching TV, with Xfe, when we lived the open plan life.

Now I don't. And I don't.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Sweet Joy

Well, Xfe is now on his way to Taiwan. About half way through his flight time (he has a change in Hong Kong).

It was especially nice to catch up with him in Paris at the weekend.

The iPad2 comes out on Friday. Should I get one? I was thinking better with a new MacBook, but I can use the wireless keyboard with the iPad at home, and it is slightly more portable than a MacBook.

Who knows...

Thursday, March 17, 2011

What A Load Of Stonewall

Tomorrow I'm off to Stonewall's Workplace Conference 2011, so this evening feels like I'm on holiday, especially as I'm off to Paris tomorrow evening to see mon C, flying in from Tel Aviv before jetting off to Taiwan.

I'm travelling with a bag full of sausages, and a large black pudding, so we and his Parisian pals can enjoy a full english on Saturday morning. For their benefit, not mine.

Thank's to all your comments on my Olympic Overspend. As a result I sought to save economies and turn off the heating at home. OMG, was I so cold last night in bed. I think it is the over-long hours I've had this week at work. In at 6.30am, leaving after 9pm...

The heating is back on ce soir.

Tonight I shall be watching more film grossness - the 2010 release of I Spit On Your Grave.

Well, having had a beta max as kids, and persuading my father to rent all the video nasties, I had to by way of homage!

I shall report back...

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

An Olympic Overspend...

...or the chance of a lifetime?

On your marks, get set...


Yesterday 2012 London Olympic tickets went on sale yesterday; or rather applications to purchase. You go into a lottery to get them.

I wasted no time:
Your ticket requests:

Sport: Opening Ceremony
Session code: ZO001
Date/time: 27 July 2012 19:30-22:30
Venue: Olympic Stadium
Price Category: B
Quantity: 3
Total cost: £2,985.00
Total maximum cost: £2,985.00

Sport: Closing Ceremony
Session code: ZC001
Date/time: 12 August 2012 19:30-22:30
Venue: Olympic Stadium
Price Category: B
Quantity: 3
Total cost: £1,965.00
Total maximum cost: £1,965.00

Sport: Diving
Session code: DV002
Date/time: 30 July 2012 15:00-16:15
Venue: Aquatics Centre
Price Category: A
Quantity: 2
Total cost: £590.00
Total maximum cost: £590.00

Sport: Diving
Session code: DV016
Date/time: 11 August 2012 20:30-22:10
Venue: Aquatics Centre
Price Category: B
Quantity: 3
Total cost: £555.00
Total maximum cost: £555.00

Sport: Swimming
Session code: SW002
Date/time: 28 July 2012 19:30-21:35
Venue: Aquatics Centre
Price Category: C
Quantity: 3
Total cost: £285.00
Total maximum cost: £285.00

Sport: Cycling - Track
Session code: CT006
Date/time: 05 August 2012 16:00-19:05
Venue: Velodrome
Price Category: C
Quantity: 3
Total cost: £285.00
Total maximum cost: £285.00

Sport: Gymnastics - Artistic
Session code: GA009
Date/time: 01 August 2012 16:30-19:35
Venue: North Greenwich Arena
Price Category: D
Quantity: 3
Total cost: £285.00
Total maximum cost: £285.00

Sport: Athletics
Session code: AT005
Date/time: 05 August 2012 18:50-21:55
Venue: Olympic Stadium
Price Category: C
Quantity: 3
Total cost: £375.00
Total maximum cost: £375.00

Maximum ticket total: £7,325.00

Your merchandise requests:
Ticketing pin badge - exclusive
Price: £7.00
Quantity: 4
Total cost: £28.00

£6.00 charge for fulfilment and secure delivery to an address in the UK

Maximum cost of application*: £7,359.00

* This is the maximum amount you could be charged. It includes the cost of tickets, merchandise and delivery. It is based on the highest ticket price(s) you have indicated you are willing to pay. Please ensure you have sufficient funds available on your Visa card between 10 May and 10 June 2011.

In theory I could end up with a bill for £7,359.00. But that of course assumes I will get every single ticket that I apply for.

Even then it is still a bargain. With a wheelchair ticket, you get a +1 for free - so I saved 25%.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

srprski film And Dana Int'l

Am watching A Serbian Film.

How grossed am I going to be?

And in other news, Miss Dana International is going to be doing Eurovision again for Israel in 2011.

Hoots mon.

Time Stands Still

It seems that time stands still when you are gone. The calendar is left lying about the date, reminding me of the day you left. The clocks regularly run down because I forget to wind them up.

K. left this morning after a 2-night stay. Last night was quiet. I was in bed by 10pm - though only because on Thursday night we were up until 2.30am, having drank between us just under 5 bottles of wine, singing to Les Mis, and then to Jesus Christ Superstar. OMG.

However I felt fully recovered after a full on day in the office yesterday.

Rather depressingly I have to go to the office tomorrow to do some stuff. This coming week is super busy.

Still, only 4 days this week and then on Friday we meet in Paris for the weekend...

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Eat Sh*t

From Tuesday night...

Oh my god; I'm listening to a programme on R4 about faecal transplants. That is transplanting good bacteria from a donor into someone lacking it, via fresh faeces recently passed from a donor with good bacteria. It can treat C.difficile.

By putting a tube through up the nose, down the throat into the stomach and sending down some fresh faeces provided by the donor.

Literally eating shit. OMG.

(Where do the friendly bacteria come from in the probiotic drinks).

Wednesday, March 09, 2011

Waiting. Desperately.

Roll on the Doctor Who LEGO compatible Character Building range.

I will have armies of Daleks, Cybermen, Weeping Angels....

These should be in the shops for Easter.

Thanks to ActiveDad.co.uk for the pics.

Tuesday, March 08, 2011

Out, Damned Spot

"A little water clears us of this deed...”

I've always loved this song, but when k.d.lang recorded this version, it blew me away.

Washing away the love? Washing away the guilt? Washing away the memories. Washing away the pain.

Only, it is not as simple as that. Far from it.

My gay best friend

My gay best friend is coming to visit this Thursday for a couple of nights. He has HIV. He sees himself as a person with HIV. I see him as a person. No-one knows he has HIV apart from me and one other person he has told. His partner does not know (though he does not put his partner at risk).

Honesty. It's the best policy.

Monday, March 07, 2011

Dreams Come True

I've blogged before about the dreams I have. My recurring dreams, or at least the recurring themes of my dreams.

The insecurity dream isn't a new one. It's one I've had before, though I'm not entirely sure whether I've referred to it.

It's the one where Xfe isn't my partner. Either (more usually) I have a partner who isn't Xfe, or I have no partner. I never know why I'm no longer with Xfe.

In each case, whichever form the dream takes, I always feel regret, longing.

A vague and constant desire for something that does not and probably cannot exist ... a turning towards the past with him looking towards the future without him.


This weekend the dream took on a new slant.

This time I'm in love with someone else, yet still in love with Xfe.

Having tossed and turned on it, and in the instant of waking, felt cursed by it, before the regret evaporated with the swift realisation that nothing had changed, I decided this wouldn't be a good situation to be in...

Sunday, March 06, 2011

Days Like These

These are the days of my English essays. The days I used to write about when the sky and the rain were as grey as the cold granite outside.

Sunday is never the best of days. This one brings a vague and constant desire for something that does not and probably cannot exist ... a turning towards the past looking towards the future.

Xfe has been away only 1 week, yet it seems as if its been weeks. I'll see him in Paris in 2 weekends time.

Friday, March 04, 2011

Mid-Week Amusements

  1. Work, not amusing at all.
  2. Thursday night drinks with colleagues. I won an award at work*...
  3. Dinner with a former lecturer from University.
  4. Saudade. I'm fascinated.
  5. Come on the weekend.
* not to be sniffed at. £250 and a bottle of pop.

Tuesday, March 01, 2011

Monday/Tuesday Amusements

  1. Work (not amusing at all).
  2. Diversity Group/LGB(T) network planning and meet.
  3. Lunch at Itsu.
  4. Work (not amusing at all).
  5. Sleep. Deep sleep.


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